CHRISTMAS IN PRISON

                                                   THE CHRISTMAS COOKIE

Conley and I were teaching a Celebrate Recovery class a few weeks ago when the ladies stood to be thankful for volunteers that brought cookies to them.  My mind began turning.....wow, maybe WE could do that for Christmas.  I called the new Chaplain in one of the units to ask permission and she jumped on the idea.  They were planning a caroling on Dec. 17 from 6-8pm and cookies could be passed out with some donated calendars.  I inquired about the head count.  We wanted the entire unit not just the Faith Based ladies.  We were told between 550 and a few more.  Oh, my.... that's a LOT of cookies.

In my small mind, I had envisioned decorating sugar cookies with pretty sprinkles and color.  That idea fell off quickly when we calculated what really needed to be done. We didn't have the green light from the warden yet, so we waited.  When the call came that we could not only bake the cookies, but pass them out back in the units!!!!!!  We were pumped.  Our directors contacted a very well established Mennonite bakery that had the equipment and experience to bake 600 cookies.  They had in fact, just finished 4,000 cookies for other units!!!!!!  We joined the bakery team and whipped out 600 Chocolate Chip cookies and put them individually in baggies and see through containers.

When Monday night came, we were SOOOOOO excited!  This is our very first experience going into the back and seeing the ladies in their environment.  We practiced quickly with the Faith Based ladies a few carols and began the big adventure.  From dorm to dorm we sang, handed out cookies and calendars and said "Merry Christmas" to each lady.  Our team handed out 300 and the chaplain's team handed out the other 300!  

What did we see??????  We saw 25-30 women sitting on bunk beds per dorm,  all in white with hollow looks in their eyes.  They had smiled as we sang, and some began to cry.  A few clapped and danced at Jingle Bells.  As we pushed past the Faith Based women, we went to 300 bunks handing out ONE chocolate chip cookie and wishing them Merry Christmas.  Their faces lit up!, Smiles covered the sadness for just a moment.  Most said "Thank You, bless you for coming to see us".  We forget, some have NOT had one letter, one call contact, or one visit their entire incarceration.  You would have thought we had handed out $100 dollar bills!!!!!  Not one turned them down or showed ANY ungratefulness, not one! We did hear, "you sure smell good as my White Diamond perfume left a quick fragrance.  One lady said as I walked away....Love her boots!"  Another lady commented on the sparkling deep blue scarf I wore with a bling bling matching necklace I had received last Christmas for my present.  Coach was the only man, but he belted out those carols like a choir boy and gave his smile away bunk by bunk!

We saw women the ages of our own children and even our ages.  Dry skin covered most of the ladies and long hair pulled back in pony tails.  There was no sweet fragrances, soft lotions, or colorful Christmas PJs.  Not one picture on the walls and no piped in mall music with "We Wish You a Merry Christmas! My mind flashed back at times when had the circumstances turned just a measure one way or the other, those could have been my kids in there!  Had I acted on feelings my own heart felt and carried at times, I could have been sitting on those bunk beds.  Are they guilty of a crime?  Most are and they admit it.  They are paying the penalty.  A penalty most of us do not have ANY idea what it truly is to be a woman in prison.  One young inmate asked Coach if we would be bringing some cold milk with the cookies.  Sadly, to say, she was very serious.  She is a young, simple girl who has a sad story.  We saw the inner child in many women that night.  

We saw JOY and happiness for those brief moments.  The guards were eating the sugar cookies I had made for them and helping us pass out calendars so everyone got one!  The halls were lined with inmates, guards, and volunteers......and guess what???? Not ONE problem occurred.  Oh, happy day!  The warden will probably say yes again next year because of that.

We finished the evening sharing a devotional with the Faith Based women.  Coach spoke on the gifts through their respect and acts of kindness  we have received from THEM since we began coming into the units.  They did not realize the impacts they have on others.  I read a poem and true story about Christmas.  Before leaving, they asked the Chaplain if they could dance for us to Mary Did You Know.  7 girls did an interpretive dance with 2 ladies singing acapella.  Another gift given from inside the bars to us!  

We often think we have nothing to give at Christmas.  As we are shopping and hustling about in the stores, we are carrying the greatest gift of all, OURSELVES!  Giving ourselves to others takes a special form and it usually touches others deeply.  We left with another gift, they left with a Christmas cookies and a memory of a Christmas they will never forget.  It was the biggest Christmas party we have ever attended!!!!!!!  

This Christmas, do not withhold yourselves from others.  It maybe the only gift they get.  Give generously and give deeply.....He that waters shall be watered also himself...Proverbs 11:25 

Merry Christmas,
Coach & Nancy

YOU SAY

And The Spirit Fell

Lauren Daigle has a hit song our called You Say.  Last week we entered a State Jail with about 50 incarcerated ladies coming into a service.  Our ministry, Lifeway Haven was asked to speak and share the opportunity to enter this 2 yr. program.  We began with worship and the second song was You Say by Lauren Daigle.  As we stood to worship, a young woman in her early 20s slipped out of her row and went to the front.  I noted she was missing some front teeth and not a beautiful girl by the world standards.  She was dressed in her white uniform and tennis shoes.  She began an interpretive dance to the song.  It was not a smooth, soft, graceful dance at all.  In fact, it was jerky and rather aggressive in nature, but VERY expressive.  It only took us a few minutes in to note that she BELIEVED what Lauren was singing about what God said she was, NOT what the world said she was.  

The ladies in white quickly began to rise to their feet and all hands lifted to heaven.  Tears flooded down faces and some sobbed.  We were overtaken by their abandonment in worship.  We thought we had seen a deep level of worship, but THIS surpassed them all.  We were overtaken by our own emotions and wept as we watched these transformed women worship and embrace what God had revealed to them about how HE views each of them.  Tears were literally dripping off their faces into their laps as they sat down.  What had just happened?  What had we witnessed?  It was the breath of the Holy Spirit, He had come, He was welcome, He fell on us ALL!!!!!  As the dance ended, the young inmate said that the Lord told her that every time she dances, things "break off" those she abandons herself in front of.  

 

Oh my, how overwhelmed we were when we left.  Maybe desperate circumstances are good for us.  Loss of privileges, loss of personal items, loss of contact, loss of technology, and loss of freedoms.... can all lead to abandonment to God if we let our circumstances mold us and we turn to God.  Had we witnessed a room full of ladies that had come to the end of themselves and the beginning with God?  Jesus said when we visit prison, we visit Him.  We believe that we experienced a visitation from the Spirit of God.  He was honored, He was celebrated, He was applauded by His creation that had been given freedom within the walls.  We were just blessed to be present as He came by and left His presence among those who have turned to Him for a fresh beginning . 

    YOU SAY    

     by Lauren Daigle

I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I'm not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just a song of every high and every low
Remind me once again just who I am because I need to know

You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am week
And you say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don't belong, Lord you say I am yours
And I believe, yes I believe what you say of me
Oh I believe

The only thing that matters now is everything you say of me
Cuz in you I find my worth in you I find my identity

You say I am loved when I cant feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am week
And you say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don't belong, Lord, you say I am yours
And I believe, yes I believe what you say of me
Oh I believe

Taking all I have now I'm laying at your feet
Cuz you have every failure, God, and you have every victory

You say I am loved when I cant feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am week
And you say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don't belong, Lord you say I am yours
And I believe, yes I believe what you say of me
Oh I believe

And I believe, yes I believe what you say of me
Oh I believe